Tam Cowan: All that glitters is litter… and I’d gift wrap the Chopper too

Tam Cowan, a columnist at the Daily Record, shares his thoughts on the upcoming Christmas season and some humorous insights. With Christmas just around the corner, Cowan reminds readers with a cheeky comment that there are only two more sleeps until the festive day. While acknowledging the abundance of Easter eggs on supermarket shelves, he also offers a serious note of caution about the potential dangers of lithium button batteries found in Christmas gifts.

Cowan lightens the mood by sharing a funny anecdote about a friend’s wife who accidentally swallowed batteries, likening her newfound energy to that of a bunny. He quips about dream Christmas dinner guests, opting for Victoria Beckham for the extra turkey. The columnist also pokes fun at the season by wondering if PC World plays “White Christmas” and expressing his distaste for glitter, suggesting it should be banned due to his lifelong aversion to it.

In a comedic rant, Cowan shares his disdain for glitter-covered Christmas cards, confessing he would discard any glittery card without reading it. He questions the tradition of wrapping gifts, pondering why gifts must be concealed when they are often easily identifiable based on shape or sound. The columnist suggests banning wrapping paper altogether to reduce waste and simplify the gift-giving process.

Adding a touch of holiday whimsy, Cowan humorously speculates on the origins of putting a fairy atop the Christmas tree and reflects on the gifts the Three Wise Men presented to baby Jesus. He shares a humorous anecdote about Jesus being questioned by a barmaid about his birthplace. The article concludes with playful predictions about future Christmas dinners and a witty tip about leaving rubbish outside charity shops during the festive season.

In summary, Tam Cowan’s lighthearted and comedic take on Christmas traditions and sentiments sprinkles a dose of humour and insight into the upcoming festive season. His musings on glitter, gift-giving, and holiday customs offer a refreshing and amusing perspective on the holiday cheer.

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